The woman described in Proverbs 31 sounds like a rock star.  She is smart, industrious, financially savvy, and honored by her husband and children.  She dresses in fine clothes and extends her hands to the poor. She has no fear of the future and she laughs at the days to come.

What an amazing woman!  She sounds like a woman I wish I could be.  

But with all her admirable qualities, something that stood out to me is that the scripture says when she speaks her words are wise, and she gives instruction with kindness.  

Kindness.

In today’s world, kindness seems like a lost art.

Merriam Webster’s dictionary defines kindness as the quality or state of being gentle and considerate of others.

The Proverbs 31 woman gives instructions with kindness.

Sometimes instruction or maybe even correction can be hard to take from someone.  And if we are on the giving end of instruction to someone, say our children, we might be inclined to bark orders at them, or feel that because we have the authority over them, that we can say whatever we want.  

But what if we could do this with kindness?  Can we share what we need to say with gentleness and consideration of the person we are speaking to?  Can we take into consideration their feelings without being hurtful and unkind?

John Gottman, world renowned psychologist and researcher, says kindness is the key lasting relationships.  Kindness makes people turn towards each other in a way that connects them. It makes them feel like we care enough that we consider their feelings and interests.

Whatever role we play in life, whether a wife, a mother, a sister, or friend, we can always give instruction or correction with kindness.  It doesn’t take much on our part, but it could mean a world of difference to the person on the other end. And it can even mean the difference between just an okay relationship and a great relationship.

~ Vijoy