I figuratively hit a wall last week.

Last weekend, after cooking my 6th meal in a row, I almost lost it.  It really wasn’t the cooking that did me in.  It was the prepping, cooking, eating, and clean up which only left me room to do a load of laundry before this cycle started all over again.  It was also the previous week of working every day, coming home and helping with school work and cooking every night that had already lit a small fire in my soul.    Ironically, there has been very little downtime in our time of confinement.   I had been fine during these weeks of quarantine, but for some reason, this week left me feeling absolutely drained.

I fled my house and went to the grocery store.  Ok, I didn’t actually flee; it was a planned trip.  I sat in the parking lot, in my car, mulling over the monotony of these last few weeks, and my eyes began to sting with tears. “Lord,” I said, “I’ve had enough.  I feel like I have nothing left to give.”  Please don’t misunderstand me- I am blessed with health, a job, family, a house and food on my table.  That’s not what this is about.  This is purely about a moment when my soul felt drained.  Without having access to the usual things that recharge me- fellowship, church, friends- I was starting to feel run down.

I remembered the story of Elijah and the widow at Zarephath from 1 Kings 17.  They are in a famine, and the widow is gathering sticks to bake her last meal before she and her son die.  She is desperate.  Elijah tells her- do not be afraid, do what you were planning, but make me a cake first.  He then promises her that neither her flour nor oil will run out during the time of famine.

So many times in the Bible when God speaks, He starts with “Do not be afraid.”  God knows that the source of our issues is usually fear.

Here’s what I read from this chapter: Don’t be scared.  Honor God first, then take care of your family, and you will have enough to be sustained during this time.   The widow followed Elijah’s instructions and his word was true.  She did not have lack during that time.

I won’t lie- what I really wanted was a good threading, a massage, and maybe a pedicure.  But my soul felt full after reading this story again.  Be encouraged- keep putting God first and He will care for you in every way.

~Shiney