It’s hard to believe that we commemorated my oldest daughter’s LAST day of school last week. What a whirlwind of emotions!
I had a flashback of our move to Texas 15 years ago. With my desire to be a stay at home mom becoming a reality, I quickly came up with a plan. Amidst boxes, my husband working from home, a toddler, and an infant, I sat for hours and put together an entire curriculum for my three-year-old daughter. I still remember color-coding each subject in the spreadsheet I created. I prepared my display board and the walls of my dining area had been decorated. Having a passion for teaching, I couldn’t have been happier to begin this new adventure with my baby girl.
However, just two months into it, our lives changed dramatically when our son became ill. Suddenly, I found myself overwhelmed with shock and exhaustion. Having to spend time for medical appointments and hospitalizations affected the time I could use to cut, glue, and create eye-catching displays, as well as following the hours and calendar I had set.
Nevertheless, I continued to do what I knew God called me to. I taught with all of my heart … without the glittery, colorful walls, sometimes during the evenings, sometimes during the summer … not as I had envisioned. It felt like a dream had been crushed. It wasn’t supposed to be this way, I would tell myself. I’ll be honest: it felt easier to remain stuck and just give up.
But we looked to God and asked for His help and strength. I’m so grateful that the Lord never leaves us and that He cares so deeply for us. He helped me to press through. To see my daughter now, preparing for graduation and going to college brings me indescribable joy. Thank You, Lord!
Maybe you had big plans, too. Perhaps, you have been planning away for a graduation or a wedding or a milestone birthday. All of those have now either been postponed, canceled, or simply celebrated with loved ones driving by your home or watching it via a video call due to the pandemic.
When you said, “I do”, you may have pictured a life full of laughter and yet, there’s been sorrow and heartache because of unresolved feelings or poor communication. When you accepted that job, you imagined it would lead to the greatest heights in your career and yet, it seems as if you’re just crawling by. You find yourself saying that it wasn’t supposed to be this way.
Dear Friend, I’m sorry. It’s okay to feel disappointed and to cry. There are many of us who can relate to life looking different than expected. There was Hannah, who wanted to be a mother, in 1 Samuel chapters 1 and 2. There was the woman, who was suffering from the issue of blood for 12 years, in the gospels of Matthew, Mark, and Luke. These women, while they were saddened, continued to look to the Lord and trust Him. He saw their tears. He heard their cries. In the Lord’s time, Hannah gave birth to Samuel. The woman had been healed.
Isaiah 55:8-9 (NLT) reminds us:
“My thoughts are nothing like your thoughts,” says the Lord.
“And My ways are far beyond anything you could imagine.
For just as the heavens are higher than the earth,
so My ways are higher than your ways
and My thoughts higher than your thoughts.”
Wherever you find yourself today, I pray that this verse encourages you: “You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast, because they trust in You.” (Isaiah 26:3)
~Joyce
Photo Credit: Left- www.justinspiredvisuals.com
