With a new school year upon us, I wish I had a few minutes to sit across from this next generation of moms and just be real…a few minutes of not worrying about being politically correct or getting canceled…a few minutes to share what has truly been on my heart. 

I’d first make it crystal clear that I am NOT a perfect parent. There are far too many moments I wish I could rewind and redo. Thankfully, my children are forgiving and my God is gracious. 

With that said, Here’s what I’d say. 

#1 Go to church. Please! 

If there’s ONE thing I’m passionate about it’s this- go to church! 

No online services for late Saturday nights or lazy Sunday mornings. Plan ahead and plan to be at church, in person. Even if you end up in the cry room or walking the halls of your church because your little one won’t stay in their class or sit in service, just go. There’s something special and supernatural about being in God’s house! 

“I was glad when they said unto me, Let us go into the house of the Lord.” (Psalm 122:1)

#2 When you give your child a phone, give them rules to abide by. 

In our home, phones were kept at the charging station, NOT in our children’s pockets or in their room. In fact, until my boys left for college, their phones stayed at the charging station overnight. 

My husband also installed filters on their phone. And we had all of their passwords. Young teens don’t need privacy. They need guidance, protection and boundaries. 

We also had rules at gatherings. Please do not take your phones out. Talk to people. That’s why we are there. (This is a good reminder for us adults too 🙋🏽‍♀️)

#3 Ask them to join you. This one applies to all ages! 

On a recent visit to my husband’s parents house in Oklahoma, my husband and I planned to visit my uncle, whom we hadn’t seen in a while. My boys asked if they could just stay back.  I insisted they join us, so they did. We had a short but sweet visit with my uncle and aunt. Just as we were walking out the door, my uncle put his hands on my boys and prayed a blessing over them. 😭

As soon as we got inside the car, they both agreed, “That was nice.” They thanked me for being insistent that they join us. 

Surprise blessings occur when we least expect it…but we have to be present to experience it. 

#4 You can never be too careful. 

You’ve probably heard the term, “Helicopter parent.” I heard a pastor recently take it up a notch and encourage parents to be a “Fighter jet parent.” Can I get an Amen? 🙋🏽‍♀️

This world is dark. Be present! I have heard way too many stories of friends who were sexually abused by “trusted” uncles or family friends. Some of these young men are now struggling in their own sexuality, and it breaks my heart! 

Even with my own sons, I trust them, but I don’t trust the enemy. He is crafty and can tempt them to do stuff they normally wouldn’t do. 

The words of my pastor have always echoed in my mind, “Even the best of kids, left to themselves, can do things you would never expect them to do.” 

#5 Teach them right from wrong. Be straightforward. 

• The STRUGGLE of homosexuality is NOT a sin, but the act of homosexuality IS still a sin. Just like adultery, sex before marriage, etc.

The Bible hasn’t changed its stance so we shouldn’t either. 

• Ouija boards and horoscopes can innocently open the door to a dark world. Don’t go there. 
• Yoga can do the same. Even the westernized “Christian” version has its roots in polytheism. Intentionally or unintentionally- Don’t give anyone but Jehovah God an open door into your life. 

#6 Take it easy.

I am all about community, but our schedules can fill up way too quickly. Learn to scale back and be intentional about planning…nothing. Then enjoy the nothingness. 

#7 Pray in your home. 

Make your home a sanctuary. If you have the house to yourself or if your babies are asleep or at school,  I want to encourage you to pray in your home. In the kid’s room, in your room, in the kitchen, everywhere! Annoint your doors with oil. Pray that God’s presence would be strong and reside. You don’t have to be an eloquent or a public prayer person (I’m not! 🙋🏽‍♀️) So when it’s just you and God- Let loose, pray out loud and pray your heart out! 

✨That’s it. Thank you for hearing me out.  Even if you disagree with half of my points, I appreciate you reading till the end. 

I pray my words will give you something to think or even pray about. ✨

~binu