Growing up, I had the privilege of being raised in a loving home. It was such a protective environment that I believe I may have been sheltered from challenges along life’s journey. As a result, my understanding of God was that if you believe in Him, then bad things do not happen to you.
Imagine my surprise once I was on my own and I began to experience “bad things”: loss, illness … to name a few.
Wait, where’s God?
Why is this happening to me? I’m a “good” person.
In time, this thought pattern transformed into truly understanding Jesus’ words: “In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.” (John 16:33 ESV) and Deuteronomy 31:8 ESV: “It is the Lord who goes before you. He will be with you; He will not leave you or forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed.”
With this deepened understanding, I realized how we were at a crossroads when it came to parenting: do we shelter our children from hurt and disappointment until they’re adults, or do we share the ups and downs of life with our children when they are young?
I mean, as parents all we want to do is protect our kids. Besides, who has the time for all of these conversations? Let them just be carefree and enjoy their childhood, right?
Well, our hearts were impressed to do the latter based on Deuteronomy 6:6-7: “And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise.”
We realized that not only did we have to teach our children the stories and verses from God’s Word, but we also had to teach them the realities of life and how to respond based on God’s Word.
So when there has been an illness or a loss, our response began with my husband and I processing together and praying about it. Then, we sat our children down and told them the general details of the circumstance. We encouraged them to freely shed tears and share their thoughts and feelings. We also invited their questions and did our best to answer based on what was age-appropriate. Without hesitation, we affirmed our faith in God to navigate us and declared His promises. Then, we asked each child to pray aloud about the circumstance. We continued this pattern throughout.
We read in 1 Chronicles chapters 22 and 23 the fine details of how David prepared his son Solomon to build the temple. Likewise, we must prepare our children’s hearts to respond in faith when something unexpected happens.
~Joyce
