It’s easy to think we know best … especially when it comes to someone else.
Your kids…your husband…your best friend…your sibling – who knows them better than you?
You love them. You see their strengths and recognize what they are good at. You want the best for them. You “encourage” them to pursue it. So, it is surprising when sometimes … they resist.
At that point, we do what any caring person would … we push them harder! After all, they must need to be challenged in this area! Then, one glorious day, when they become really successful, they will look back on the conversation they had with YOU as THE defining moment of THEIR ENTIRE LIVES.
Admittedly, it wasn’t that dramatic, but I have actually experienced that for myself. One of the reasons I am in ministry now is because a long-time friend, James, pushed me and my husband outside of our comfort zone. He saw things in us we couldn’t see in ourselves. Likewise, I’ve had the joy of empowering women around me to write, teach and step beyond what they ever envisioned themselves doing. And now I see them thriving in it.
It’s great when it turns out that way.
But sometimes, it doesn’t. Sometimes, instead of pushing people towards what we think is right for them, they run away from it … and from us.
Because the fact is, as well as we may know them, there is still one person who knows them better than we do … they know themselves. They have a sense of what comes naturally to them and even more so, what they actually enjoy doing. They understand how to operate most effectively in those strengths.
In 1 Samuel 17, a giant named Goliath was taunting the nation of Israel. Everyone was afraid to fight him until David came on the scene. This young shepherd tells King Saul that he has killed a lion and a bear … and with God’s help, he will destroy Goliath too.
Saul agreed to it but then proceeds to equip David…with his armor
“Then Saul dressed David in his garments and put a bronze helmet on his head, and put a coat of mail (armor) on him. 39 Then David fastened his sword over his armor and tried to walk, [but he could not,] because he was not used to them. And David said to Saul, ‘I cannot go with these, because I am not used to them.’ So David took them off. 40 Then he took his [shepherd’s] staff in his hand and chose for himself five smooth stones out of the stream bed, and put them in his shepherd’s bag which he had, that is, in his shepherd’s pouch. With his sling in his hand, he approached the Philistine.” (1 Samuel 17:38-40 AMP)
Saul had good intentions. He was actually trying to help David and even protect him. But he didn’t take the time to ask David about his previous battles. Saul assumed he knew based on how he would have done it or maybe how he had seen it done in the past. In Saul’s eyes, wearing his armor was the only way David would defeat this giant.
But David knew better. David recognized God had equipped him differently so he didn’t need to use Saul’s tools. He didn’t have to change who he was even if it looked different from everyone else around him. David knew what would work and that what he had was enough.
And it was.
Maybe the person in your life isn’t doing things how you think they should. But if they have prayerfully considered your words and declined, it’s not for you to force them to wear that armor. Trust that the God Who guided them in the past, will guide them again.
When Saul released David to fight the giant however he wanted to, David wasn’t limited by something man put on him. David approached Goliath boldly because now he could walk in the confidence of who God made him to be. Nothing more. Nothing less.
Don’t stop encouraging the people around you. Maybe your confidence in them will be just what they need to do something new.
Or maybe they’ll realize they are right where they are supposed to be and where God wants them to be too. A person who knows who they are in God is better than someone trying to fit into someone else’s armor. Whatever they decide, they must always know our heart for them: they are accepted, they are enough…
And we believe they can defeat some giants.
~ Anu
Featured Image: Photo by Nik Shuliahin on Unsplash
